I am a closet fan of the “What Not to Wear” show…not that I want anyone to know that I watch a reality TV show….but I love the concept that everyone should be comfortable with their own body and that external changes can make a world of difference for one’s psyche. Stacy London, co-host of TLC’s What Not to Wear, has just come out with a new book, The Truth About Style (Viking Press, 2012) in which she describes her philosophy of style. Her Zen-like mantra is “take what life has given you, accept it wholly, and then build on it.”  With that as a baseline style can be healing.

Style, according to London’s philosophy, requires an unbiased acceptance of self, where your body is and what your life circumstances are. Style starts with your brain before it gets to your body.

Stacy discusses how to dress well, why to dress well and why we often do not. She helps us get into the mindset that leads to a happier and healthier sense of self. She talks about the kinds of psychological obstacles we place in our own path that keeps us from owning our personal style. Style, unlike fashion, is personal. It’s about the individual. 

Style is about enhancing who you are and not attempting to look like someone else. 

“By changing your style, you are forced to change the way you perceive yourself. And if you can see yourself differently, you can start to feel differently.” Eventually we believe because we can see.  

In her book Stacy tells stories of ten women that she helped to see themselves differently. Each is a metamorphosis from cocoon to butterfly.  Her tales provide a “kick in the step, a swing in the hips, and a twinkle in the eye.” Try her short enjoyable read and see how comfortable you are in your own skin!

Daniel S. Hammermesh is an economist who has spent the last two decades in a scholarly pursuit of the impact of beauty on society. In his new book, “Beauty Pays: Why Attractive People Are More Successful” (Princeton University Press, 2011), he provides study after study that measure the influence of good looks on economic behavior and on outcomes in the workplace.

The advantages of beauty in a culture are not unique to the United States. An emphasis on human appearance goes back at least to the ancient Egyptians and is the subject of studies in Asia, Europe, and South America. Vanity rears its head in both genders and it spans multiple age groups.

In the United States 5% of consumer spending is directed towards personal appearance. Studies have shown that the average man spends 32 minutes in the morning grooming and the average woman spends 44. The time spent on grooming does not diminish as we age. Magazines are dedicated to beauty secrets and fashion tips. The average American believes that disadvantages based on looks are real, and many report having felt the victim of such discrimination.

Preference for beauty represents pursuit of an ideal. Just as Justice Stewart identified pornography as “I know it when I see it” we know beauty when we see it. Even though there is cultural variation and generational differences of opinion, studies of people’s facial image show that there is a large degree of consensus about which people are most attractive. There is substantial agreement upon what constitutes human beauty, male and female.

Within each profession you find some who are good looking and some who are not. Those seen as more beautiful are more likely to earn higher wages and more likely to get promotions. Do good looking employees raise sales? Customers are attracted to the more beautiful sales people and are more likely to buy the products they endorse. If looks are a part of a product or service than we assume that customers will value that and better looking sales people can raise revenues.

So what about the unattractive? Beauty benefits the beautiful and can increase a company’s sales and profits. But “lookism” is a form of discrimination. There is more discrimination based on looks than there is on ethnicity. Check Dr. Hammermesh’s book to see what studies measured this effect. It is a fascinating study in how to look scientifically at our prejudices and preferences.

If ever there was a woman who could reinvent herself at every age it would be Jane Fonda. She has just released her new autobiographical book of wit and wisdom entitled “Prime Time.” For Jane, her prime is being in the moment and that moment for her is at 70, Act III of her life. She has always strived to be her best self at every phase of life.

“Prime Time” is a look back at how Ms. Fonda recognized that she wanted different things at different decades. She came to learn that she pursued her dreams most happily when she took charge by making informed decisions. She reminds us of the adage that “luck is where opportunity meets preparation”.

As she enters her late life, Act III, she explores how much of aging is negotiable. Can we maximize our health and happiness by the choices we make.  Jane has eleven ingredients she recommends for being proactive about the quality of one’s life. She details healthy habits regarding diet and exercise.

She advocates life long learning, strong friendships, and connection to larger causes. She speaks openly about her own goal of increasing her ability to be present in her own body, to experience her body with self empathy. She talks about how plastic surgery for her was a proactive way of embracing embodiment, getting comfortable in her body. At 72, Jane had surgery on her jawline and eyes to look and feel her best for her third act. She gives the analogy that aging is a bit like martial arts. When the force comes you don’t oppose it, you just try to guide it. Jane Fonda is a gentle guide for all of us facing the force of time.

Visit this link to see an interview.